Romance and Self Control
08 Nov 2021
Having infinite self-control isn’t actually that helpful. It’s mostly downsides. The biggest downside is interacting with women.
The general understanding of male romance is that guys have strong urges to just grab beautiful women, tell them they love them, and give them a fat kiss. And these urges have a billion different expressions. A guy will just put his hand on a girl’s shoulder because he wants to. It feels good to do it. A guy will grab the girl’s hand or put his arm around her back. And that’s how a date is supposed to go. The guy just goes out and makes it romantic/affectionate because he really has a strong urge to do so.
In light of this this, boys are trained to control their urges towards women. It’s bad to just go out and grab them. It’s bad to just touch their shoulder. Do things with consent. Whatever. Guys are told to fight that urge and also trained to deaden that urge.
And I think for most guys this may be the proper amount of correction. The woke circles certainly overcorrect because they basically advocate for no romantic initiation from men at all. But for the general trend of training boys to control their urges to women, as it’s done by normal folks, that’s ok for most men. At least it’s not overcorrecting too much.
But for men with much weaker urges, even the normal level of trained restraint is way too much. Many men lack strong sexual urges altogether. They’re not homosexuals, they’re not asexual, they just don’t have the strong driving urge to express their desire to the object of their affection that other men do. Maybe it’s a lack of testosterone, maybe it’s a particularly restricting upbringing, maybe it’s just general differences between people.
I have such strong self control that I practically don’t do anything. Right now I see an incredibly cute dog just hanging out with their owner and yeah I’d like to go over and pet it, but the urge isn’t so strong that I can’t control it.
Ok time has passed since writing that last paragraph. I did indeed walk up to the dog owner, asked if I could pet her dog, and proceeded to pet the dog for like 20 minutes. She was cool and we talked about law school stuff for a bit while I petted the dog. Maybe the post is just bs.